Finding the Light
Both one of my first paintings in this series, and one of the last. It started as a painting about being alive while the world is ending. Initially there were burning buildings that could be seen outside through windows. After Hermione died, I really didn’t care about those buildings anymore. Though there are still remnants of them found in the painting hanging behind the figure.
I repainted Hermione, added (added back in) the lamp, and drew in oil pastel a picture of my hand scratching her belly. When Herm and I lived together, she was always interested in what I was doing. She greeted me when I got home. We would play and she would ask for belly rubs. When I ate dinner, she would eat dinner. At the end of the day (or the middle of the night) I would play video games and she would be captivated by the movements on the screen. I sometimes worried that she would swat at the screen, but she never did.
This painting reminds me of these shared moments . Sometimes I wish that I had given her more attention, but I also know that she was happy. I want to remember the joy of those times, instead of the pain of losing her.
I remember the way my fingers would always catch on one clump of hair, even after brushing her.